Micci, Ronald (American playwright, advertising proofreader-editor,
1948-____), “Ping-Pong, Charlie Chan? [formerly "Thank You, Charlie Chan"”
a 10-minute crime melodrama parody, set in a hotel
room in midtown Manhattan, night, 1930s,
3m
;
• © 2000 by Ronald Micci; •
scripts and rights available from Ronald
Micci, 75 Vreeland Avenue, Rutherford, New Jersey 07070, U.S.A., phone
(home) 201-438-3267, (work) 212-297-7290, e-mail RVMicci@comcast.net.
• Cited by Ronald Micci via ftp, May 11, 2001; Micci says,
§ Dramatis Personae Charlie Chan
(m), the famous Oriental sleuth, thank you so much; Number One Son (m),
30, with the “Gee, Pop” good looks and smile; Victor Wilson (m), a hostile
intruder who doubles as the narrator, heir to the Wilson ping-pong ball
fortunes.
§ Synopsis “‘In the ink-black city,
the icy hand of fate sometimes touches the shoulders of even the very famous—a
detective like the legendary Charlie Chan.’ So begins this parody of the
old Charlie Chan movies, with Chan and Number One Son holed up in a midtown
hotel, being stalked by a mysterious killer. Chan enters and quickly moves
to the phone, attempts to call a ‘Mr. Montgomery’ to warn him of impending
doom, when out of the shadows appears Number One Son to throw a sashcord
around his neck and kiddingly pretend to throttle him. Number One Son warns
Chan he has been followed all the way from Cincinnati, that Victor Wilson,
the heir to the Wilson ping-pong ball estate, is planning to murder him
in order to prevent him from warning Montgomery of his intentions. He bids
Chan lock the door while Number One Son explores the hotel in an attempt
to locate Wilson. Naturally, not long after he leaves, a sinister voice
is heard from the shadows, the voice of the intruder. ‘I don’t let anything
stand between me and my balls, . . .’ intones the sinister Victor Wilson.
Just then, there comes a knock at the door. Number One Son, disguised
as room service, delivers a meal and springs a trap on the unsuspecting
Mr. Wilson. Charlie Chan wins again!
§ Comment “Unit set—telephone, armchair,
side table. Script contains sexual innuendo; therefore, it isn’t appropriate
for high school.”
Addendum 020312: “Thank You, Charlie Chan
(3m) (15 min.)
The veteran Oriental sleuth is back, and finds himself
in a New York hotel
suite at the mercy of a mysterious naked stranger.
A parody.”
§ Themes Charlie Chan, crime, detective, gun, hotel, intruder, mystery, noir, phone call, ping-pong ball, room service, sleuth, son.
See also Ron Micci’s:
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"Biff Bang, American Hero," a 10-minute comedy spoof of radio cliffhangers in English, set in the cockpit of Biff's fighter bomber, 1998, 2m1f
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"Breakers," a 45-minute melodrama in English in eight scenes, set in three venues, a rented room, the ocean, and an arid precipice on the New Jersey Shore, a summer day, 2002, 1m1f
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"The Color of the Sky," a bare-stage 7-minute melodrama in English, set in Suzie Ann's backyard, a summer afternoon, 2f
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"Dark Snow," a 10-minute melodramatic monologue in English set in the parlor of Aunt Lida's home in the New York woods,
1997, 1f [see items below for 2f versions]
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"Dark Snow," definitive version, a 20-minute melodrama in English set in the parlor of Aunt Lida's home in the New York woods, 1997, 2f [see above for 1f version]
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"Dark Snow, Evening," a 10-minute melodrama in English set in the parlor of Aunt Lida's home in the New York woods, 1997, 2f [see above for 1f version]
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"Dark Snow, Morning," a 10-minute melodrama in English set in the parlor of Aunt Lida's home in the New York woods, 1997, 2f [see above for 1f version]
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"Dink Fast, Harry!," a 10-minute detective comedy-melodrama in English, set in Harry Dinker's dumpy office, daytime,
1998, 2m1f
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"Director's Cut," a 7-minute film noir, set on a Hollywood set, 1940s, 2m
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""Family Ruins," a 10-minute melodrama in English, set in the downstairs parlor of a spooky old house, an April evening of 2003, 1m
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"Flying Medusas," a 10-minute contemporary farce in English, set in the theater of the absurd, at no specified time, 1m1f
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"Good Tidings of Christmas Cheer," a 10-minute black comedy in English, set in London, Christmas Eve, in the time of Charles Dickens, 3m1f
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"The Grackle," a 10-minute radio melodrama-farce in English, set in a radio broadcast studio, 1930s, 2m1f (but could be
played with any combo of m/f)
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"Happy Endings," a 15-minute comedy-fantasy in English, set in the living-room of Cornweevil homestead in Midwest, 1996, 2m1f
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"Harry Dinker, Private Eye," a 10-minute detective parody in English, set in Harry Dinker's office in the "downtown section of a grimy city nobody has any use for," afternoon, 1998,1m1f or 2m
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"Herman," a 10 minute comedy in English, a 10-minute comedy in English, set in a luncheonette, 1998, 1m3f
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"High Concept Harry," a 20-minute dark comedy in English, set in Harry Fleck's literary/talent office in Hollywood, afternoon, 2000, 2m
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"Thin Laughter in Heaven," a 10-minute bare-stage melodrama in English, set on a cliff overlooking a lake, May, 2001, 1m
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"Tragic & Trapped in Teaneck," a 13-minute comic melodrama in English, set in the parlor of a home in Teaneck, New Jersey, U.S.A., afternoon, turn of the last century, 2m1f
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"Two Views: A Crash Course in Life," a 15-minute melodrama in English, set in a bus stop, during morning commute, 2001, 1m1f
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"Wild About Harry!," a 15-minute detective farce in English, set in a sleazy gin joint; later, Harry's apartment, night, 2001, 2m1f
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"Wolves, James? [formerly Moonlight's Little Madness,"
a 40-minute drawing room farce in English set in the parlor of the Prescott country estate, England, a spring evening during the Victorian Era, 2m
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