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“It’s Only Fuchsia If You’re a God Damn Fag”

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Casner, Howard W. (American playwright, 1954-____), “It’s Only Fuchsia If You’re a God Damn Fag,”

a 20-minute drama in English, set in a bathroom, early evening, the present, 2001,


  •  © 2001 by Howard W. Casner;  •  script/American rights available from playwright Howard W. Casner, 619 West Stratford, 304, Chicago, Illinois  60657, U.S.A., e-mail hcasner@aol.com, telephone (home) 773-871-7860; or script/international rights from agent at  byrn@hollowhills.fsnet.co.uk.  •  Cited by Howard W. Casner, via e-mail April 2, 2001; Casner says,

  §  Dramatis Personae Azzie (m), 28, with tattoos and a piercing or two, blue-dyed hair; Bayard (m), 22, red haired.

  §  Synopsis “Azzie and Bayard lounge in Azzie’s bathtub after having sex. Bayard, quite cavalier about sex, offhandedly discusses conquests, including a recent guy he met in Amsterdam. For him, meeting strangers from all over the world and knowing people in ways that others don’t are some of the great benefits of being gay. Azzie tolerates these stories; after all, he himself is casually seeing a man named Kent. Still, Azzie has been expecting Bayard to inform his lover, Cash, of the relationship with Azzie and leave Cash. Bayard has avoided confronting Cash, who has been going through a difficult time; Bayard can’t bring himself to complicate the difficulties. Bayard’s cell phone rings. It is Cash, who is leaving work early and wants to meet Bayard for dinner. Bayard dresses for the date. His comments make Azzie see that Cash does know of Bayard’s affair with Azzie. Bayard admits Cash learned last week. Azzie assumes that this means an end to Bayard and Cash, but as it turns out, Cash is willing to let a college-age Bayard continue to sew his wild oats, and Bayard is not so ready to leave Cash, for whom he has a strong affection. Azzie decides whether there are circumstances under which he is willing to continue seeing Bayard.

  §  Comment “The play includes nudity, simulated sex, and considerable raw language. A cell phone rings.  Water in the bathtub is pantomimed. The title comes from a joke about two old women choosing material in a fabric shop: one turns to the other and says, “It’s teal.  It’s only blue if you’re a god damn fag.” The suggestion is that for straights, relationships tend to be more black and white (or in the play’s case, a simple pink).  For gays, where relationships can be more variable, it’s rose or salmon or fuchsia, or any other color that corresponds to pink one wishes.”

  §  Themes affair, bathroom, bathtub, commitment, fidelity, gay, homosexuality, love, nudity, perspective, relationship, sex.

See also Howard W. Casner’s


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