Small-Cast One-Act Guide Online


"The Great American Refrigerator"

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Gordon, Fred Jay (American playwright, 19__- ), "The Great American Refrigerator,"

a 30-minute 12-scene comedy in English set in a contemporary mountain resort, 1996,

2m2f (+ m bit), late 20s or early 30s,

© 1996 by Fred Jay Gordon, script available below, rights available from Fred Jay Gordon, 574 East Shore Rd., Kings Point, NY 11024 U.S.A. Cited to present author by playwright, via e-mail fjgordon@mail.earthlink.net, December 8, 1996; Gordon adds,

Dramatis Personae

Synopsis "During a few hours of a weekend at a mountain resort for singles, everyone meets in front of the refrigerator and woos with their own particular bravado. Names are changed, identities revealed, offstage showers are dark and busy. Under a forced slaphappy giddiness is the truth that human hearts want love and honor while fear of isolation and fear of failure lie everywhere. Some people can change and win, some change and lose, and some can't change at all.

Comment "The actors must have a comedic flair and yet be real, must be able to present a mask and yet be able to reveal what's under that mask. Actors who have good physical timing and move well are a great benefit. The play needs to have a particular look, and the director and designer need a clear style. The play was first performed by The American Place Theatre, in New York City."

Text

"The Great American Refrigerator"

a once-act comedy by Fred Jay Gordon

Scene 1.

(Down center is a stylized representation of refrigerator with its back to the audience. The refrigerator door opens from left to right but right now its door is closed. Moonlight comes through an offstage window. Except for the refrigerator, the stage is empty. ALEXANDRA Enters stage right dressed in a bathrobe - as are all characters in this play. ALEXANDRA wears glasses. Her face is always looking at the floor except when she is rummaging through the refrigerator. This looking to the floor and then looking out front while in the refrigerator is done by all the characters in the play. ALEXANDRA slowly approaches the refrigerator. When ALEXANDRA opens the refrigerator door, the refrigerator's light goes on. She sticks her head inside and looks through the shelves which, to us, appear empty. ALEXANDRA'S hands move in the refrigerator slowly as if the refrigerator were her body. ALEXANDRA 'Hhmm's" as she looks but, not finding anything, she closes the door and goes off stage right. GEORGE leaps from the wings from stage left and runs to the refrigerator. Quickly, he runs his hands through the refrigerator as if it were the live body of a woman. GEORGE "Yes's" deliciously. But he finds nothing, leaps up and runs off stage left. ALEXANDRA enters upstage center, flips on an imaginary wall switch which lights up the stage. He skips to the refrigerator, trying to suppress his excitement. ADAM touches everything in the refrigerator as if it were his own body and about to lead him to orgasm. His breath quickens on each object and ADAM "Oh's" and "oh's." But, still quite tense, he gets up, closes the door, skips slowly to the lights switch, turns it off, then exits. ALEXANDRA enters stage right, stops. She looks up at the refrigerator, pauses, looks down, pauses, and she quickly goes off stage. Pause. ADAM enters up center, skips down to the refrigerator, waits, puts his head down, and skips off. Pause. ALEXANDRA walks from stage right to center stage and without stopping, she turns and walks quickly off stage right. GEORGE enters from stage left in a leap. He stops, puts his head down, and leaps off stage left. Pause. ADAM enters up center, flips on the light switch, takes two or three steps down stage, stops, pauses, turns and goes off up center. ALEXANDRA and GEORGE enter from their respective sides. Each comes in about three steps. Pause. Then they each look up at the refrigerator, see each other and instantly leap off. Pause. GEORGE leaps back on stage. Pause. Leaps off. ALEXANDRA leaps on, sees no one, leaps off. Pause. GEORGE leaps on stage and just as he stops, ALEXANDRA leaps on, holding her glasses, sees GEORGE and suddenly they both cross to opposite sides of the stage. They almost bump center stage. ALEXANDRA goes off stage. GEORGE turns and waits. ALEXANDRA reappears and both quickly cross back across the stage. Just before ALEXANDRA exits, she drops her glasses, and leaps off. GEORGE, still looking down, grins very big. He crosses down stage left, pulls back imaginary curtains, steps behind them, and pulls the curtains closed. He sits down, crosses his legs, and is able to peer through the curtains to watch for ALEXANDRA. ALEXANDRA walks out and picks up her glasses. She looks around but sees nothing. She puts on her glasses and crosses to the refrigerator, opens the door, kneels down, takes off her glasses and, while facing front, moves her eyes to look for GEORGE. GEORGE, still behind the curtain, now looks at her and grins. Just as GEORGE is getting up, ADAM enters up stage center. ADAM sees ALEXANDRA and ALEXANDRA hears ADAM. She is happy. So is ADAM who skips to her and sits down. They both look front through the refrigerator.)

ADAM

Hello.

(He is very warm and very loud.)

My name's Adam. I'm very glad to meet you. Ah-Jane?

ALEXANDRA

(Giggling.)

Alexandra.

ADAM

(LEANS HIS EAR TO HER.)

Alexandra?

ALEXANDRA

Yes.

(Long pause.)

Adam.

GEORGE

(From behind the curtain.)

But you can call me George.

PAUSE

ALEXANDRA

I thought it was Adam.

(ADAM nods happily.)

GEORGE

George.

ALEXANDRA

Oh. George.

ADAM

Adam. It's a real pleasure meeting a lady of your quality.

ALEXANDRA

Scene

ADAM (WARM & LOUD)

Adam, Alexandra, Adam. (Pause. ) Been here long, huh?

ALEXANDRA

Well, let's see. Mother drove me to the station at 8:46 for an 8:48 to Hammerville. Arrival in Hammerville was non-eventful upon which I changed modes of transportation, and transferred luggage, for early afternoon trip at 12:14. Thereupon, seated comfortably and with packaged lunch, I glanced thoroughly through several of my subscribed magazines and saw, that of all the others traveling with me, I was interested in no one. Changed modes of transportation at Orenston after another uneventful trip. Then-oh, my goodness we went into the mountains they were so magnificent and-finally, after dozing slightly-there was no one on that trip I was interested in either-I arrived, sans any fatigue and with my new luggage. I'm so very happy to be here. I do look forward to all the events. Yes? Yes?

PAUSE

ADAM

Been here long, huh?

ALEXANDRA

Not really.

PAUSE

ADAM

Did we meet last time around?

ALEXANDRA

What is your name?

ADAM

Adam, from the Revierre side.

ALEXANDRA

Oh. Oh, oh - my!

ADAM

You've heard about my brother George?

ALEXANDRA

Well, I'll say.

ADAM

I'm younger.

ALEXANDRA

Oh.

ADAM

Begging your pardon, I don't seem to be able to place you.

ALEXANDRA

But you don't have to.

ADAM

Yes, of course, but it's got no savior faire. Like I'm un-gallant.

ALEXANDRA

We live in the now. Take advantage of it.

ADAM

(Presses his cheek next to hers and they both look front.)

From the moment I saw you, I knew it was a moment to remember.

PAUSE

ALEXANDRA

Go on.

ADAM

(Using his seductive best: )

1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10. 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10.

ALEXANDRA

Oh. Oh. I'll bet you say that to everyone.

(Pause. )

Your voice is so - so - moist.

ADAM

10-9-8-7-6-

ALEXANDRA

Oh, no more. No more. Oh, please - Adam.

GEORGE

George.

ALEXANDRA

Well, whomever!

ADAM

5-4-3-2-

ALEXANDRA

George?

(She turns and looks at ADAM and then quickly faces front.)

ADAM

And 1, Alexandra, and 0, Alexandra, and-

GEORGE

Alexandra-

ALEXANDRA

Oh. Oh.

GEORGE

(Simultaneous with ADAM: )

4-5-10 again, 8 again, more 7 -

ALEXANDRA

Hey, you! Hey!

ADAM

Hmmm?

ALEXANDRA

(Seductively)

Alexandra would love a cigarette.

ADAM

Don't smoke.

ALEXANDRA

Didn't think you did.

(She puts on her glasses.)

But maybe you can rustle one up for me, cowboy.

ADAM

Right. Right, Alexandra. Right away. Be back in a flash.

(ADAM walks upstage, turns to look at ALEXANDRA, then exits.)

ALEXANDRA

(To GEORGE: )

Would you bet on that, huh, guy?

(ALEXANDRA gets up and pokes at GEORGE through the curtain, then exits stage right. GEORGE stand up, steps through the curtain, closes the refrigerator door, and flips off the light switch. Suddenly GEORGE stops and grins while still looking at the floor. Slowly, his head rolls back and his eyes raise to the ceiling.)

GEORGE

Alexandra -- !

(He exits stage right.)

PAUSE

ADAM

(Enters with cigarette.)

Alexandra? Alexandra?

(He exits dejectedly.)

BLACKOUT

Scene 2.

(Sounds of a shower)

HENRY

Who's in the shower?

ALISSON

No one.

HENRY

Alisson?

ALISSON

Hi, Henry.

HENRY

Ah - you alone?

ALISSON

Sort of.

HENRY

Hmm, well, hey, lemme know when you get a group together, okay?

ALISSON

But, Henry, I am a group.

HENRY

Yeah, I know, Alisson, that's the problem.

Scene 3.

BELLA

(Opens the refrigerator and the refrigerator light and moonlight appear. BELLA sings like a soprano: )

I am looking for a raspberry. Also looking for an artichoke. For a chicken wing. A cupcake. Put them all together they spell hap-pi-ness. Yes. I'm looking for -

ALEXANDRA

(Runs on)

Do you know if there's man named George?

BELLA

(Sings: )

She is looking for a George.

(Speaks: )

What's with a George, honey?

ALEXANDRA

Well, I'm hoping there is a man named George because I'm trying to find a place to hide so he can find me. But I lost him.

BELLA

(Sings: )

She is looking for a-

ALEXANDRA

Ah - never mind, but thank you, miss.

BELLA

It's Bella to you, babes.

ALEXANDRA

Oh, no. It's nothing to me.

BELLA

You mean, it's nothing for you.

ALEXANDRA

Well, goodbye, now.

BELLA

Stick around. Things could warm up a bit.

(ALEXANDRA stops, then exits.)

Oh,

(singing:)

ring! Ring! Ring for Bella. Bella rings for you. Oh, yes: ring! Ring!

(PAUSE.)

George? She came and asked me if I knew George. I don't know George. I think that's obvious.

GEORGE

Do you know a woman named -- ?

BELLA

She's hiding.

GEORGE

Where?

BELLA

She's not sure yet.

GEORGE

Oh? Oh, well, hey, thank -

BELLA

(In her soprano voice: )

Stick around, George, things could warm up a bit.

(GEORGE exits.)

A bit.

BLACKOUT

Scene 4.

(Sounds of the shower.)

ALISSON

Who's in the shower?

HENRY

It's me, Alisson. Henry. It's Henry, Alisson.

ALISSON

Are you alone?

HENRY

Yes.

ALISSON

Can - I come in, Henry?

HENRY

I'm doing an eleven, Alisson.

ALISSON

Will you let me know when I can come in with you?

HENRY

(PAUSE.)

I'll let you know, Alisson. But I'm doing an eleven.

ALISSON

Oh. I can respect that. Later? Henry? Fine, then, all right, later.

Scene 5.

(Moonlight up.)

ADAM

(He skips toward the refrigerator. Just as he is about to open the door, HARRISON glides on-stage and flips on the light switch. ADAM stands up immediately and screams silently with his mouth wide open.)

HARRISON

Whoops! Didn't mean to interfere.

ADAM

(Recovering quickly.)

Been here long?

HARRISON

(He comes down to the refrigerator, opens the door, and starts eating.)

Not really. You?

ADAM

(Standing.)

Not really.

HARRISON

(Takes out an imaginary spoon from his pocket and samples some food.)

How are they?

ADAM

(Looks for something to eat.)

Not bad.

HARRISON

Seen anything you like?

ADAM

Uh-huh.

HARRISON

Oh?

ADAM

Jessica.

HARRISON

How is she?

ADAM

Don't know.

HARRISON

(Slaps HARRISON on the back.)

Didn't you get in?

ADAM

Not yet. You?

HARRISON

She's my sister.

ADAM

How is she?

PAUSE

HARRISON

We don't make it that way. You?

ADAM

I'm an only.

HARRISON

Never really had to think about it, did you?

ADAM

I fantasized.

HARRISON

It's not the same.

(PAUSE.)

Getting much?

ADAM

My usual. How're you comin'?

HARRISON

Regularly.

ADAM

Me, too. More now than before.

HARRISON

Me, too. We learn.

PAUSE

ADAM

How many?

HARRISON

Four blondes, two brunettes, and one balding.

ADAM

Who?

HARRISON

The balding?

(ADAM nods.)

Lilia.

PAUSE

ADAM

Made her scream for ten minutes.

HARRISON

I got fifteen.

ADAM

The first time. Second time was twenty.

HARRISON

Me, too. What about the third?

ADAM

Uh, can't remember, blurs into the fourth.

HARRISON

Hey, ho, that's just the way our first hour was.

ADAM

Well, well! Same with us.

PAUSE

HARRISON

How much?

ADAM

Let's not be kids, for God's sake.

HARRISON

How much?

PAUSE

ADAM

Nine inches.

HARRISON

(Sighs in relief)

Oh. Yeah. Hey, my name's Harrison.

ADAM

Adam here.

HARRISON

If you link into a goody, share it.

ADAM

Will do, Harry.

HARRISON

Catch your act later, man.

ADAM

Share the goodies, man.

HARRISON

(Standing)

Right, Ado!

ADAM

Right!

HARRISON

Later.

ADAM

(Begins to eat.)

Later, man.

HARRISON

(Exiting)

Keep it up, man.

ADAM

(Eats faster)

Up, man.

(ADAM stuffs himself until he can't get any more food in his mouth. He stops and continues looking straight out to the audience. Suddenly, he takes a handkerchief out from his pocket and spits all his food into it.)

Once, I was fourteen, remember? We were in the Boy's Room during lunch hour. There were about eight of us. This one guy who lived near a gas station said he was getting it all the time. I don't remember how exactly, but he made us all take out our schlongs and measure. He thought his was the biggest. It wasn't. Nope!

(Pause. )

"Keep it up, man."

(ADAM rises, closes the refrigerator door, and exits up center not skipping.)

Scene 6.

(ALEXANDRA enters and goes down to the refrigerator. It is now daylight. She opens the door, kneels, and waits. GEORGE enters, sees ALEXANDRA and crosses to the refrigerator where he kneels next to her. They face front.)

GEORGE

(Chuckling with embarrassment)

George here.

ALEXANDRA

(Giggling)

Alexandra. I'm Alexandra.

GEORGE

Alexandra.

ALEXANDRA

My mother loved Hollywood. George.

PAUSE

GEORGE

You're kind of like a soft boiled egg.

ALEXANDRA

Kind of. You're kind of like a hard boiled egg.

GEORGE

Kind of. Butterfly.

ALEXANDRA

Tigerlilly.

GEORGE

A-L-E-X-A-N-D-R-A.

ALEXANDRA

G-E-O-R-G-E.

(GEORGE points to something in the refrigerator and says, "Alexandra." ALEXANDRA points to something in the refrigerator and says, "George." They exchange several times. Then they both point to the same food in the refrigerator and say, "Yes" together. They reach for it. It spills. GEORGE takes down a "newspaper" from the top of the refrigerator to dry the spill. Then he starts reading it. George holds it out in front of him which forces ALEXANDRA to see what GEORGE reads.)

GEORGE

(At first, he reads with animation but, as the story progresses, he reads with less and less inflection.)

"Seven children were killed and 52 other persons injured today when a chartered bus carrying youngsters and teachers skidded off a rain-slick highway in the mountains. All the dead and most of the injured were 11 or 12 years old. The state police said that the bus ripped through a series of guard posts before hurtling down the steep embankment, turning over, and coming to rest against the stone foundation of a deserted house. All available ambulances in the area rushed to the scene after the accident, which occurred about 2:00 p.m. The police said some of the passengers were trapped in the bus and others were pinned underneath. A teacher, who could not be identified, told this reporter that the accident happened without warning. 'When I looked up I saw the bus just spinning off the road,' he said. 'It seemed to lose control and fly off the road.' "Andrew Wallenby, of nearby Piedmont, one of the children aboard, said he was sitting in the back seat at the time of the accident. 'All I know is the bus started turning very fast and somebody screamed to grab hold of something so that's what I did,' he said. 'Then a little boy started falling out of the bus so I caught him.' "The police said the roof and the side of the bus had been ripped open. 'It was a mess,' a State Trooper said. 'There were children all over - ' "In the hours before the fate of the bus passengers was known, a mother, her eyes red from weeping, said to this reporter: 'We've known about this since 2:38. I can't understand. We don't even know who's alive and who's dead.' "'Special to the Times.' There's list of the names.

ALEXANDRA

Don't read it.

GEORGE

Alexandra? Alexandra?

ALEXANDRA

George?

GEORGE

Alexandra. Alexandra-

ALEXANDRA

George -

(ALEXANDRA and GEORGE lower their eyes. They turn their heads toward each other. ALEXANDRA slowly raises her hand and touches GEORGE'S face. GEORGE slowly touches ALEXANDRA'S face. The frame of the refrigerator stretches across the stage about six more inches in each direction. PAUSE.)

BLACKOUT

Scene 7.

(Sounds of the shower. Hold the sound. Then we hear the faint noises of a man and a woman making sweet love.)

Scene 8.

BELLA

(BELLA is stuffing food into her mouth very quickly. Her eyes are wide and her face is pained. She stops stuffing, picks up the newspaper where GEORGE found it, glances at the same article, shudders and puts it down.)

HARRISON

(Comes bouncing on-stage, sees BELLA, and rushes down besides her.)

1-2-3-4-5-6- --

ADAM

(Enters up center)

BELLA

Melissa Meyers wasn't very tall but she had dark braids and her mother used to weave pale yellow ribbons into Melissa's hair and drive her to school every day in a huge dark blue car. Melissa was very beautiful to watch. I'd watch her from my window sometimes during the day, in the afternoons, and every once in a while Melissa would come to town to buy soft ice cream and she'd ride her bicycle and her ribbons - oh! They flew out behind her like flashes from God's great sun. And her face! What a face! Sometimes I watched her very closely because - because in a way she's like -- We both had red bicycles. Although mine wasn't brand new and - and when I was a girl - before I was thirteen, I guess, yes - I had braids, too. Long, soft braids. Not as long as Melissa's though. And Melissa had a younger brother. I never had a younger brother because my mother always worked nights. And slept days. But Melissa had a younger brother and sometimes they'd both bicycle into town for soft ice cream and they'd ride on their new bicycles and I could see them laughing. I could just sit in my window behind the curtains and see them. Well, Melissa grew up and married and had two children. A girl and a boy - Melody and Jason. And they'd ride into town on their bicycles, too. I'd see them. From the window. I - I just called Melissa's house. Her mother answered. I hadn't spoken to her mother ever. I didn't know what to say and the old woman sounded tired and thin. Very thin. When I put down the telephone, after mumbling, 'I'm sorry for you - I'm just a friend and I'm very sorry,' I was so tired.

(BELLA suddenly opens her mouth and throws back her head. ADAM comes and sits down next to BELLA who lowers her head and stares at the audience. The frame of the refrigerator is stretched horizontally about two feet. ADAM and HARRISON turn to BELLA.)

Will you-? Will you?

(ADAM and HARRISON nod.)

I want you both.

(ADAM puts his hands on BELLA'S face. HARRISON puts his hands on her thighs. BELLA leans back and shoots her arms straight up over her head.)

Now!

BLACKOUT

Scene 9.

(During BLACKOUT: )

ADAM

Sometimes you never know where you really are.

HARRISON

(Overlapping ADAM: )

10-9-8-5-3-

BELLA

(Overlapping)

Don't talk, don't talk, don't talk, don't talk -

ADAM

Say my name, please, I'm Adam, just say, 'Adam,' okay?

HARRISON

6-4-2- like it, babe? Whew, right, am I good, or what? 3-2-1- right?

BELLA

Shssh, don't talk, just do it, do it, do it -

ADAM

I'm Adam.

HARRISON

It's big Harrison, take it, it's Harrison, oooh, I'm so hot -

BELLA

Make me sing, oh, God, I want to sing, I want to sing, make me sing until I'm pure.

Scene 10.

(Lights up immediately)

HARRISON

(Stares out from the refrigerator and grins. As soon as the lights come up, HARRISON speaks: )

Woooo, I was damn good. And nothing's going to change that. I see it all going on. The ups and the downs and the turns and the twists. I see them. And everyone is waiting for some new punch in the head just when they think it's all going fine. They're all quivering. But I'm going to hold on. Because I've got it where I want it and no-one's pushing glass in my eyes. I'm Harrison and, brother, I know I'm Harrison and I'm going to let everybody know it. You watch. I'm going to be around. You'll feel me.

(He looks at the refrigerator shelves and, with his fingers, he follows a moving object. He catches it, puts it in his mouth, chews it and laughs.)

Wooooo! I just heard it go: 'crunch.'

BLACKOUT

Scene 11.

(Sounds of the shower.)

ALISSON

(Giggling: )

Want to do it again, I mean, we have the time, hmmm?

MAN

(Easily laughing: )

Slush and sleek -- slippery raspberry juice -- I could eat you all over.

ALISSON

You have a way with - language! Ready?

WOMAN

Hello? Anyone? Anyone in there?

ALISSON

Yes and no -- !

WOMAN

You alone?

MAN

No. Are you?

WOMAN

I'm just outside the door. It's chilly. It's dark.

ALISSON

You like it like that?

WOMAN

Not really. You inside?

ALISSON & MAN laugh

MAN

Hey, you, come on in, there's plenty of room.

WOMAN

Momma always said it pays to knock. Thank you. Oh! Hi!

Scene 12.

(Daylight up. HARRISON looks through the refrigerator shelves. ALEXANDRA enters wearing glasses.)

HARRISON

(Looking front)

Who are you? From the moment you entered this room, I knew it was a moment among moments. No! Don't speak. Come, come, my lovely and sit next to me.

(ALEXANDRA hesitates.)

We are human and alive and here now. Come sit next to me.

(ALEXANDRA slowly crosses and sits next to HARRISON.)

You are shaking, mon petit pigeon, whyu? Have you caught my smells? Are they in your head and rushing through your body? My name's Harrison.

(PAUSE.)

My name's Harrison.

ALEXANDRA

Alexandra.

HARRISON

Alexandra. Alexandra. Alexandra. It's like a song. You are rare, Alexandra. Like a young angel who's just beginning to use her wings. Fly with me, Alexandra. I'll make you - fly - like you've never flown before.

(Very long PAUSE. They both look front. The refrigerator frame stretches another foot or so.)

ALEXANDRA

To be perfectly honest -- which is not necessarily a virture - nor is it something which is required or even expected in these weekend situations - but, honestly, I am not now who I was before, so, me, being direct with you, Harrison, I need to tell you I think you're a little scary.

HARRISON

Oh, but my sweet, sweet Alexandra - or whoever you are - how rare this moment, how important we strike when the metal is hot, how mellifluous the flowers of your gentle -

ALEXANDRA

You've got too many words.

HARRISON

Hey, ho, now, babe, we're roses and spring is fleeting and -

ALEXANDRA

There's a lot more going on than you admit, Howard.

HARRISON

Suck me.

(HARRISON crosses to stage left corner of the refrigerator frame and looks out front.)

GEORGE

(Enters and crosses immediately to ALEXANDRA. They look into each other's eyes.)

There's a woman named Bella who read what we read and she - she knew one of the little girls.

ALEXANDRA

Did you talk with her?

GEORGE

My brother did. Adam's still with her.

ALEXANDRA

Hold me.

(They wrap their arms around each other. The frame stretches horizontally.)

(ADAM enters, sees GEORGE and ALEXANDRA, and smiles. ALEXANDRA see GEORGE, gets up and cross to the stage right corner of the refrigerator frame and looks front..)

ADAM

(Comes down to GEORGE. PAUSE. The refrigerator frame stretches wider.)

George? There's this woman, Bella. There are parts in her which vibrate so silently.

GEORGE

And you know them.

ADAM

Do I care? Do I really care?

GEORGE

Banana splits and marshmallow fluff.

ADAM

After mowing the lawn.

GEORGE

Follow your nose.

ADAM

George?

GEORGE

Her name's Alexandra. I think.

(GEORGE crosses to ALEXANDRA and faces front.)

BELLA

(Enters from up center.)

Adam? Wasn't it amazing?

(He nods.)

And it was just you and me, after the newspaper, God, it was -- Or are you - cooler -- now?

ADAM

(Turns away.)

In a way.

(Comes back to her and they kiss. They pull back and look at each other. They kiss again.)

Well - ah -

BELLA

We can be friends, though, can't we?

ADAM

It's nothing personal.

BELLA

It's just chemistry?

ADAM

Yeah, friendly.

BELLA

But - you mean -- not magic?

ADAM

Oh, yeah, magic, but not magic!

(They shake hands and laugh.

(We hear Sonny & Cher's "I Got You, Babe" in a recording edited for this ending. GEORGE stands, ALEXANDRA stands, they put their arms around each other and dance. ADAM stands, BELLA stands, they dance without touching. HARRISON enters. During the following, HARRISON walks around and between the two couples.)

HARRISON

Woooo, I was damn good. And nothing's going to change that. I see it all going on. The ups and the downs and the turns and the twists. I see them. And everyone is waiting for some new punch in the head just when they think it's all going fine. They're all quivering. But I'm going to hold on. Because I've got it where I want it and no-one's pushing glass in my eyes. I'm Harrison and, brother, I know I'm Harrison and I'm going to let everybody know it. You watch. I'm going to be around. You'll feel me. Wooooo! I just heard it go: 'crunch.'

(Music louder, lights brighter, everyone freezes.)

'Crunch!'

BLACKOUT

THE END





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Quick Connections to Cast Size/Gender Menus

1 Actor
| One-Male Plays | One-Female Plays |

2 Actors
| One-Male-One-Female Plays | Two-Male Plays | Two-Female Plays |

3 Actors
| One-Male-Two-Female Plays | Two-Male-One-Female Plays | Three-Male Plays |
| Three-Female Plays |

4 Actors
| One-Male-Three-Female Plays | Two-Male-Two-Female Plays |
| Three-Male-One-Female Plays | Four-Male Plays | Four-Female Plays |









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Small-Cast One-Act Guide Online
complements the print volume

1/2/3/4 for the Show: A Guide to Small-Cast One-Act Plays

by Lewis W. Heniford

(Lanham, Maryland: Scarecrow Press, 1995), ISBN 0-8108-2985-1, $39.50, plus s/h
Scarecrow Press, 4720 Boston Way, Lanham, MD 20706
telephone 800-462-6420 or 301-459-3366, fax 800-338-4550

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